It's been a long week

I never would have thought that visiting the area where Kyra died would have such a tremendous affect on me. I knew last Saturday that I wasn't feeling very good about being in the area but ever since then my heart has ached more and the questions are never ending.

What's worse is now the holidays are quickly approaching and everywhere I go I see things that I should be buying for her as gifts, but have no reason now to buy them. I need to go to the Dollar Store but haven't because I always went in there to get her personal items like shaving cream, make up pads, cotton balls, etc that I would then fill a bag with giving her a couple months worth of supplies. We always bought her a coat, scarf, gloves, hat, and boots this time of year. We always made sure she had her winter clothes; sweaters, socks, etc. I know the holidays will never be the same again for me or my family so I've decided to try to make the holidays productive and beneficial to someone somewhere. I can take that money I would have spent on Kyra and spend on someone who might not otherwise have a gift to open. I've contacted the Morris Home in Philadelphia and offered my help for both Thanksgiving and Christmas as a way of "Paying it Forward" as well as a tribute to my daughter. Might I suggest that anyone reading this find a way to help someone somewhere in your community, it could be as simple as purchasing a food item or simply helping to cook, whatever it is you can do nothing more special this holiday season then lending your hand to someone in need.
Truly be thankful for all the things you do have and not regretful for the things you don't! Most importantly hug and love those closest to you, because today may be the last day you get to do so! Don't have the regret of not getting to say I love you one last time!!!!

My biggest regret as of today in my life, not being there in those final moments of my child's life, being able to let here know she was loved. Being able to provide her some sense of comfort in those final moments and then not knowing sooner that she was gone!

This is now what I have left of my daughter, no the necklace wasn't hers, but it does contain a bit of her, so she will always be close to my heart. In the blink of an eye, she went from being a beautiful woman to fittting into this necklace. Rest in Peace My Sleeping Beauty.